Monday, January 3, 2011

It always starts with a break up...


I mean really, what story of self reflection doesn't start with a broken heart or break up or divorce or abandonment of some sort? It's a cliche. I wouldn't say my heart is broken. Well, not anymore. In fact, one might say that it is quite in tact. More of my pride is... mangled. Let me be frank, I was a horrible girlfriend. He was an atrocious boyfriend. Together we were a monstrosity. The year and a half long relationship was a mistake to say the least. I plan on using this blog to grow the hell up, honestly. Blogging may seem like a pretty dumb way to grow up, but my therapist told me to keep a diary and whenever I try to write in a diary I write so hard and much that my hands cramp and the pencil breaks. It's a pain really... So. Here goes nothing.

I am young. Possibly too young. Mature in many ways and immature in even more ways. I have mild insomnia. Hence the writing at 1:30 AM. I am the youngest in my immediate family. I am short. I like sweatshirts and tight jeans. I am normal looking; pretty, in a stereotypical blond way. I like drawing, books, cooking, gardens, organic food, and animals. I watch too much television. I grew up in a loving home and am still close with my parents. I have nightmares often and overreact when my pride is bruised. I admire beauty. I love fashion and men and women. I like people in general, humanity is just fantastically, horribly, interesting.

I have issues. But really, who doesn't have issues? Or maybe the more important question is this: does the fact that I admit to having problems make me weaker than those who hide their pain? or stronger?

Well... that's what's up.

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